She said that during sex he talked way too much! She said he’d say things like, “What are you thinking right now?…Do you want to move in with me?…I think we should live together….I’ll raise your son and we can be a family… You can go to school and I’ll take care of you….”

WOW Not Sexy.

My friend is the most non-committal girl ever, so hearing something like this really freaks her out…especially in the moment. When she’s thinking logically, she realizes it could be a really good deal, but in the moment she needs someone to be more sexual….less Dr. Phil.

I think that his fantasy is: to have a family and to settle down. So, that would really turn him on to hear her say what he wants her wants to say. However, she is not going to say what he wants to hear, and she is definitely not hearing the things that turn her on in bed.

She and I agree, the deepest convo you should be having during sex is, “Oh yeah deeper deeper yeah!” Not this guy. He would love her to propose to him in bed.

Is this a case of complete incompatibility? I don’t know, but they definitely need to have a little talk outside the bedroom. You know a “turn-ons,” “turn-offs,” and “what to never never say in bed because it makes it impossible to cum” kind of talk.

He then goes on to explain that fantasizing during sex is not an indicator that you have an unfulfilling sex life. Rather, it indicates you have a healthy sex life. “The brain is the biggest sex organ and a little fantasizing goes a long way.”

Kerner makes a great point, and this disproves the misconception that porn is only for people that can’t get any action.

Porn is a tool that helps facilitate fantasies. Websites that play into men’s fantasies such as My Friend’s Hot Mom, My First Sex Teacher, and Seduced By A Cougar, all give men a visual manifestation of their sexual fantasies. Whether you later recall these fantasies in your mind during sex with a partner or on your own time, fantasizing is a healthy part of your sex life.

So Naughty Americans, I have to ask: Have you fantasized about someone else during sex…someone other than the person you were having sex with? If so, what was the situation, and what did you fantasize about?

Generally I am not a girl that has sex the first date, second, or any formula thereof. I have sex whenever I fucking feel like it, and a guy being too pushy is not going to sway me in the direction he wants any time soon.

Do you have any idea how often I literally have to throw guys out? Literally I have to tell them they need to leave Now. That’s generally how my dates end. The guys could just leave, make me fantasize about them all night, and maybe get a slam dunk next time, but no. Instead they’d rather be way too pushy, turn me off completely and make me have me tell them directly, Look, you seriously need to get the fuck out.

Example: This weekend I met a guy who was completely cute. We ended up going to dinner that night, I had a great time, and I was into him. He walked me home.all good things.

But then how the hell do I get rid of him? I said good night. He didn’t leave. I told him I had to get to bed. He didn’t leave. Even before we left the restaurant and he told one of his friends he was going to walk me home, I thought, “Fuck, please no, I really hope I don’t have to throw him out. That is so not sexy.”

After telling him everything I could muster-up to the effect of Hey, thank you, its really time to go now, trust me, I started on with my regular business as if he wasn’t even there.

I went inside, grabbed a mop and bucket, took it in the elevator of my building, went down to the basement and started mopping up a mess I’d made earlier (In 5 inch heels). He still didn’t take the hint.nor did he help.

As we got back up to my apartment, I was not about to let him back in. I lost count of how many times I told him good night, but I think he finally got the hint when I opened my door, ran inside and physically blocked him from getting in.

THEN Cassanova went in for the kiss.about half an hour too late buddy.game over, but thanks for playin.

That’s when I realized the key to getting what you want is
a) Admit to yourself what you want
b) Have the balls to tell others what you want
c) Don’t settle for anything other than what you want
d) Be prepared for the consequences (ie, this one might not be “the one” and it may take you longer to find a perfect match, but you won’t get stuck with something you don’t like.)

Make yourself a grocery list of all the things you want in a partner, and a list of deal breakers. This list will evolve over time as you experience life and learn more about yourself.

This makes asking girls out a lot easier, because rather than asking anything of them, you’re simply stating who you are, what you want, and they are free to come along. If they choose not to, great! You’ve just eliminated them from the pool, and you didn’t have to change and bend to cater to someone that’s not right for you. You can cross her off the list without investing too much of yourself by barking up the wrong tree.

For example
Instead of ambiguous questions like: “You wanna hang out sometime”

Try: “I know this great restaurant that has amazing brunch. I’d love for you to join me.” Or “I’m checking out this new art gallery this weekend. I’d love for you to join me.”

Let her know you have exciting things going on in your life, and she’s more likely going to want to “hang out.”Hang out” is a vague phrase that doesn’t say anything specific about you.

What it does say about you is that you are interested, but scared to turn off this particular girl so you leave it open-ended rather than asserting who you are. You’re making your proposal one-size fits all. But, when it comes down to it, you’re not one-size fits all.

So what’s the point of hiding that fact? All you’re going to do, if you don’t find it out then, is find it out later after you’ve invested in a few dates, or worse, an entire relationship!

So you need let it be known who you are. Yes, you will turn some people off. Perfect! They were the wrong ones anyway. But guess what:the right ones will find you a lot easier.

However, saying “nice guys finish last” isn’t generally said by “nice,” confident, and assertive men. That statement in itself is a very passive and pussy thing to say.

While said “Nice guys” may see a jerk, women see this:

Positive Characteristics of a Jerk:

*Assertive: they go after what they want in life.
*Not enough time to cater/ suck-up to everyone else. They have important things going on in their lives; more important than getting pussy.
*They do what they want to do & what’s best for them. *They may provide options and ask for opinions, but all options are something they’d like to do.
*Don’t waste time. They have a plan, and they execute it.

All of these qualities tend to make a man successful in his life, and therefore attractive to women. The perfect balance of these characteristics that will both get AND keep women is: Going out of your way to make yourself successful, not going out of your way to make others miserable.

It takes a confident man to act this way whether he is a jerk or not. Girls don’t like the games that jerks play, or rude behaviors towards others.
While women may overlook rude or jerk behavior for a while once attracted, what will not attract them is acting like a pussy.
By pussy, I mean: being passive and letting the world happen to you as opposed to making things happen for yourself. By pussy I mean: blaming others for taking the life/women you want instead of going after what you want until you get it. Lastly, a major indicator that you are acting like a pussy is if you don’t stand up for yourself.

Yes, a jerk would stand up for himself, so would a confident “nice” man, but not a “pussy.”

In summary: Yes, women may like certain things about jerks. Women appreciate it more when you are not a jerk, but are a confident, assertive “nice” man. “Nice guys” only finish last if by “nice guy” you mean pussy.

But then, we had to go a little deeper into the issue at hand. This particular viewer was a 24 year old virgin (which is not that old by the way) and was just ready to get laid. There are a few factors that go into getting laid, and the first of which is: her willingness to fuck you in the first place.

He didn’t even know: Maybe she was a virgin too. In which case, there’s no way she’s giving it up on the first date, or the second, or probably even the third. If you are wanting to fuck right away, you need to make sure you are going after girls that are at least interested in doing that.

Even still, whether she is going to fuck on the first date depends completely on her. You don’t need to pressure her at all. Sure flirt, make a move, kiss her, but you don’t have to be too eager because if she wants to fuck on the first date, she will. If not, then you’re the pushy needy desperate guy that she’s going to avoid.

Furthermore, no amount of money you spend (on a legitimate date) is going to increase your chances of getting laid. If you spend $50 or $500, if she wanted to fuck you on the first date, she will, and if not she won’t. (The exception is if you clearly and completely chintz out: she may have initially wanted to fuck you, but then realized you’re lazy and not worth it.)

So, Why spend the extra $450?

Why not spend that towards the next 9 dates and increase your chances of getting laid over time?

If you want to increase your chances of getting laid exponentially, that’s when you spend the $50 on a date, and the $450 towards investing in yourself: ie education, a nice car, watch, clothes…for you!

Girls come and go….with all the shit that you bought them. So why not invest mostly in yourself? Because then when the next one comes along, she will see an improved version of you, rather than a broke used up version of you. That is more attractive to women.

You’ll see that the more you invest in yourself, over time, the quality and the quantity of pussy you will attain is much greater.
More on the Cost Benefit Pussy Analysis Theory to Come…

You walk over and say “Hi,” she says “Hi,” now what?

Right now what’s most important is that you break the ice and start a conversation. Its not so important what you say because she has already given you the inviting smile saying “I want this guy to talk to me.”

Whats most important is that you approach her confidently. Even if you are scared-shitless (which you shouldn’t be because she has already given you an invite) act as you would act if you were comfortable. Its called “fake it ‘till you make it.” Women are attracted to men that they can look up to and learn from, not that are intimidated by them. You might think “Oh its cute to be this guy who has all these things going for him, but is intimidated by her. It’ll be a compliment.” No, its not cute, and it’s not a compliment. It’s an immediate signal to her that you are not good enough for her,and she can do better.

Break the ice by making a comment relevant to the situation, or something relevant to her. (Not that she’s just so pretty you had to come over. All that translates to in her mind is that you are looking for tail, and couldn’t think of one relevant thing to say.)

If she is walking a dog: easy conversation starter. If she is in gym clothes, ask “Do you always look this good right after a workout?” Follow that up by naming the closest gym and ask if she goes there. If she’s reading a book; “You must not be terribly interested in that book, because you kept looking up at me.”

If you are at a coffee place or anywhere where you have to order something, ask if she’s been there before, and what she recommends. Then make a comment about what she says. If she says something sweet, spicy, hot etc….easy lead to make a cute comment.

(Please Please Please don’t say, “I see you here all the time…” unless you have actually met eyes before and just hadn’t come up and talked to her yet. If it sounds like you watch her daily, and go to the same place at the same time she does, just to catch a glimpse….now she thinks you’re a stalker. Now she has to walk a new route to work every day. Good job.)

Great! You broke the ice. Now, just get her talking about herself. Ask her name.

A good tactic is to be so interested in what she’s saying that you don’t even say your name until she asks you. This makes her work for it a bit. And, if she’s into you, she’ll want to know your name. If not, she won’t really care. Also, if you say it up front (first thing) she’ll forget it, feel weird for asking it again, and when she gives you her number, and you text, she’ll hope you spell it out because she won’t know.

Now, you’ve broken the ice, she knows your name, and she’s still in front of you.

The next discussion will be about the conversation, and how to leave her wanting more.

 

*First Off: When getting in the business of approaching women, it’s important to remember and understand that rejection is just part of the game. Don’t take it personally. It’s impossible to catch every single stranger you attempt to talk to on a good day, with plenty of time to talk, with a fantastic compatible personality, single, and interested in exactly what you are bringing to the table.

Even in sales, good odds are 10%. This doesn’t mean one out of every 10 will say yes. This may mean you’ll have a dryspell of 90 No’s and then a flood of 10 Yes’s. The only way to get more Yes’s is to keep asking…and to make sure you’re asking the right target market….and to make sure what you’re “selling” is something the market you are targeting even wants.

There are ways to improve your odds that must begin before you even approach anyone.

1. Establish eye contact! What are the odds you are going to happen to be the man of her dreams if she won’t even look over at you? If you can’t catch her glance, there are better odds she’s already found the man…or woman…of her dreams, is not interested, or is just too busy to talk right then.

If she’s scanning the room and allowing the opportunity for your eyes to meet, at least it’s a signal she’s open to meeting people.

2. Next, smile!

a)      There are few things weirder than a guy staring at a girl for an extended period of time, and not smiling.

b)      Smiling is an instant message; “Hey I think you’re cute, wanna talk?”

If she smiles back, that’s an invite to start a conversation.

If she looks away, don’t necessarily think she’s not interested; she may just be shy. If she looks back shortly after, that is your invitation.

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One problem here is that you can’t take things from “The Friend Zone” to the next level. That’s because once you’re in the Friend Zone, the only level past that is “The Awkward Zone.”

You have to skip The Friend Zone all together and let her know from the beginning that you are a guy that is either a hook-up guy or a potential relationship guy, but not a help her with moving, bring her soup when she’s sick, hear about all the other guys she’s dating ; friend guy.

How do you do this? Ask her out; immediately. Also, set up the next date when you are on your first date.

If you ask her out when you first meet her, then your first call isn’t weird or daunting because it’s more of a confirmation.

First dates are best to keep casual, and comfortable. Go some place you know, and do something you are good at. That’s a good way to show her the confident real you as opposed to a nervous trying to impress a girl version of you.

Keep it casual at first, but also keep a more intimate follow-up location in your back pocket in case things are going well (and not your place). It’ll be a nice surprise when she thinks things are winding up if the date is going really well.

A great first date idea if you meet her at a bar or a club on a Saturday or Friday night: invite her to Brunch the next day. This shows her you actually would like to hang out; right away while you’re fresh in her mind. It shows her you’re not trying to take her home while she’s drunk and tired. It gives her a reason to give you her number. Also its casual, unassuming, with plenty of potential.

Make your plans for your second date while you’re on your first date. Listen to what she says, and what she’s into.  Plan right there to do something along those lines within the next week. In a day or two text or call her with the show you found, museum exhibit, etc. This way, again, this call is more like a confirmation than a cold call.

Also, at the end of the first date, go for the kiss. A little one at first; not a slobber-all-over-the-face smooch to start. Just go for a little kiss. She can either slap you, in which case you had no chance anyway. She can give you a cheek, which is not a bad sign: she could be interested, just planning to start kissing you on the next date. Or, she may meet your lips and give you a little kiss right back. You’ll have to take it from there.

The first two studies found that the average erection was between 6.2” and 6.4”. However, in both studies, the researchers let the men measure themselves. In the Lifestyles study of 2001, however, the men were measured by nurses. This study showed that the average erection had shrunk to 5.9 inches.

But what do the ladies prefer? The Huffington Post featured a Penis Size Preference Chart to see what women really want. The chart shows that on the average, women feel that 5 inches to 11inches in length and 4.75” to 7.25” in girth can be enjoyable, but not ideal. These women feel  7.25” to 8.25” is the perfect length, and  6.25” to 6.5”  is the perfect girth.

Why is the average cock size so different than the “ideal cock” women in the Huffington Post’s chart said they fantasize about? Is it perhaps because they have become used to seeing large cocks in porn? Maybe it’s because of all the large sex toys they’ve come accustomed to. But then again, maybe those toys were created to fill the void the average cock wasn’t filling.

Then again, this supposed “ideal cock” range is based on averages as well, so clearly there are outliers of all ranges. In other words, the perfect cock depends on the girl.

I for one tend to like a little on the smaller side, when a lot of girls I know believe bigger is better all the way. Maybe there isn’t any one size fits all amazing penis size to compare oneself to. Maybe it’s just about finding the perfect match.

PS…in the meantime, never apologize for your cock size ahead of time. It may have been just perfect, but you automatically put an idea in her head that it wasn’t.