A new documentary style book by Phillip Toledano reveals the world of phone sex operators and uncovers some interesting insight many of us may have not realized before.

In a recent interview with Rosecrans Baldwin, Toledano said that one surprise he saw throughout his observations was how many of the sex phone operators genuinely loved their jobs, felt as though they were helping people, and had “discovered things about themselves, sexually or otherwise.”

I have to say that as a person who talks to hundreds of other people about their sexuality, I can identify with the sex phone operators, because I feel like I have learned a lot about myself as well.

One thing I’ve learned is that it is perfectly normal to have outrageous fantasies! One of the most common questions I am asked is, “Is it okay if it’s a weird one?” No fantasy is weird! The most outrageous fantasy is still a fantasy. They are there in our minds just to turn us on, not necessarily to lead us to act out on anything we wouldn’t actually want to do.

Another thing I’ve learned about myself is that I have a really naughty dirty mind. I realized this because the fantasies that some women think are scary, taboo, or are afraid to reveal: I think are totally normal. In fact, most of these taboo fantasies I’ve dreamt about too. Many of them I’ve acted on without even fantasizing about it.

I think any situation in which you are (freely and without judgment) exposed to the sexual thoughts of others; will naturally help one learn more about their own sexuality.