I might possibly be the “Best Pussy Eater in The World.”

When I was younger, I showed my older sister all the inventive crazy tongue tricks I can do. In amazement she said, “It’s a shame you’re not a lesbian.” I replied, “What’s a lesbian, and why can’t I be one?”

This weekend was great. Aside from the fact that I’ve pretty much gotten tired of every boy on my plate, I still got a lot of action. This was a surprise at first, but after reviewing the facts which are: I always have unbelievable things happen to me any given weekend: I realized it should not come as a surprise at all.

Tomorrow I’ll talk about the guy that can make any woman squirt in 30 seconds or less. This is because I want to ask his side of exactly what to do. It was amazing, so look for that tomorrow.

For now, I’m going to tell you why I might possibly the Best Pussy Eater in the World.

A few months ago was the first time I ever ate-out a girl and was actually into it. Right after that, I ate out her friend. They both went wild, bragged about it, and said I was better than any guy.

At first I thought they were just being nice, until practically the same thing happened two nights ago.

However, this time, I was even way more into it.

I was at my friend’s house and it was toward the end of a party. It was pretty late, so she and her husband invited some of us to stay over.

This was the first time she and I ever started to make out. It was really hot. I started to go down on her. I’m not going to give away all my secrets, but the girls love it when I suck on the lips, the clit, and even the vag- before sticking in my tongue. Also, I use my nose while my tongue is busy doing other things.

When I am really into it, and the pussy tastes really good, I can do it forever.

She was going crazy, and told her friend she had to try me out. Her friend was great too, I had them squirming and freaking out.

Afterwards, my friend told me “I truly believe you have the potential to be The Best Pussy Eater in The World!” Later when she told me this again, I said “really?” She assured me it was beyond incredible, maybe the best ever, and she would be glad to help me practice to reach my full potential.

Do they offer a Gold in this sport? Because I think I just started Spring Training.